I’m not eating mayonnaise anymore. Every time I do it, my stomach churns like an unbalanced washing machine and my esophagus spews hot air like a dryer vent. I’m done with it. 

I’ve been dealing with mayonnaise all my life. Never really been a fan, but I eat it anyway because it comes along with things I really enjoy- like tuna salad, egg salad and a bunch of other foods. Gotta take the good with the bad, they say. But as I’ve gotten older, the taste of the mayo has been overtaking the taste of the other…